Poetry, Prose and Summer Sizzle

The deal was two out of three falls, winner take all. We started scrapping before the bell even rang. I couldn't wait to whip his ass and take his crown but he is after all the Prince of Darkness. I should have known he was going to cheat. He used his tail to leg whip me to the canvas. Before I knew it he had me in a figure four leg lock, but I wasn't done yet. I brought some brass knuckles in with me. I reached down in my pants grabbed ahold of my ... er, knuckles and came up with a few good strokes, er ... blows hits to his face. He was bleeding like a stuck pig. That's where the burns came from. (Didn't you know Satans blood is like acid? Do your homework people!) I'm not sure how I got behind him but I finally got him in the patented "Tommy Knocker" (that's a modified sleeper hold) and he went down! HARD! Round one to Tommy! The only problem was I got poked by one of his horns ... hence the stiches.
The second round it was much of the same ... kicking, spitting, biting ... just flat out scrapping in the mud and the blood and the beer. I hit him so hard he shat in his tights so there was some of that as well. I remember him shooting in low and when he grabbed my legs, slipping in a rather large, oderiferous pile of shit blood or something. It was that time he brought his head up and knocked me slap the fuck out broke my nose and pinned me. Round Two? Damien's Dad.
Round three came. This was it. Winner of this fall gets the crown. suddenly I felt a power surging through me. I looked over into his corner and there he stood ... one eye swolen almost shut, blood dripping from his nose and mouth, tail cracked in two places ... he was a mess and didn't look so damned scary anymore. We walked out into the center of the ring and bumped knuckles. I could see the grudging respect in his eyes. He despised me and I think he feared me a little too. We went at it and the action was a blur. He knocked me down in the corner and got up on the cage. He pumped the crowd and prepared to deliver the death blow. It hurt like hell but I managed to roll out just before he hit the ground. He was stunned. I grabbed him by the broken tail and threw him into the corner. I jumped up on the second rope for leverage and pummelled him mercilessly. I saw his eyes glaze over and jumped off the rope. He stood there wobbling for a bit. Back and forth, back and forth then the laws of gravity kicked in and his face hit the mat. I could smell the water in my tights as I got excited victory. I rolled him over and that was it.
So now Tommy rules the underworld. My horns look good but I had to send out for a new tail. The old one was beyond repair. Dr. Mengela said it would never swish right again. But the nurses here? OH MY! They remind me of royalty. And the "service?" Can I say with a clear concience it's almost "heavenly." Of course I can because I rule here now! Ladies ... the line to congratulate me on my victory forms to the left. And I promise ... no brass knuckles in these tights. I'm just very happy to see you.