It's amazing ...
How the most mind-numbing, automatic chores can just wipe your brain like a squeegee. Is it wrong to say I love doing dishes by hand, laundry and cooking? I didn't think so, either.
Edit: I wanna tell you something you may not know, but probably might have gleaned in the past month. A while ago, I was diagnosed with bi-polar disorder and prescribed medication to help me out with that. I know, I know ... I hide it so well, whoda thunk it if I hadn't mentioned it? But hey, again, that's the way I roll. Pfffffft!
The meds really seemed to be working ... I was a pretty happy guy. But some personal shit has transpired over the past month and the meds don't seem to be working as well as they did.
I have an appointment with Doctor Feelgood when I take vacation next month and really hope that we can get me back on track. So I just wanted to say, sorry for all the fucking downer posts. It's just that sometimes I feel like if I don't write it out, I'm gonna fucking explode or something. I can't really talk to anyone about it. I mean, SERIOUSLY. Would you want to be on the other end of that conversation? Puh-LEEZE!
I have never believed in the disease-of-the-month club. I was raised to just stuff it, suffer through it and get better, and by GOD don't you DARE burden anyone else with your problems! Admitting shit like that is weak and if you show weakness, you're gonna get steamrolled.
But I'm learning that depression is a monster bitch with sharp fangs and claws that she uses to perfection. Freddy Kreuger should take lessons. (Call me Fred, I'll introduce you.) I really am sorry that I do this shit and then send out the notifications, asking you to come suffer through it with me, but, hey, Misery loves company, right?
Can't promise that it won't happen again, but I promise to try and keep it a little more under control. I like you guys a lot and like having you around. Don't let this bitch chase you off, okay?
Oh, and one more thing ... thanks for listening. Love ya.
Comments
you know what? no apologies needed man.. if we didn't want to read it we wouldn't right? I deal with the depression monster myself a LOT and it sucks big time.
Hang in there.. hugs!
Posted by: sandi | July 29, 2007 6:56 PM
laundy and cooking i can agree on but doing dishes....after 18 yrs of cooking and cleaning up by myself i'd be damned happy to turn the dishes over to anyone willing.....
and i can assure you, if the bitch hasn't chased me off yet....don't look for it to happen. no apologies needed. be well, my friend.
Posted by: lime | July 29, 2007 9:12 PM
Dear Fred,
Why are you apologizing? This is your blog and we are your friends. So spill your guts as much as you want.
Now about that dishes and cleaning crap. I don't clean and I don't do dishes. If I didn't have a dishwasher, I'd be eating off of paper plates and eating with plastic utensils. And if Lori didn't clean when she came over the house would never get cleaned. I do cook though. We do have to eat so I learned to do that. But the rest? Forget it!!!!!
Yours truly,
Tony
Posted by: BTExpress | July 29, 2007 9:51 PM
Awesome picture!!!
And for Christ's sake... listening to this stuff is the reason we come around ;)
(aka: Tony's right, that's what blog friends are for!)
Posted by: Addict | July 30, 2007 10:25 PM