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AAAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHHH! No, it's not Contraband Days and I'm not a pirate! Apparently, my whore of a blog was out catting around and had unprotected sex with another blog and has picked up some kind of disease or is pregnant or something. It sure feels like morning (or should that be mourning) sickness. I'm working on it with a little help from a friend. So, the four or five of you I have left ... be patient please. Love ya'll! Now back to the catacombs ...

**Edit: Apparently, according to the "nice" man at my hosting provider, there is a mysql problem with the server but "admin" is working to get it resolved. Still sounds like crabs or the clap to me! Pffft!**

**Edit 2: I had to rebuild the database ... again ... but at least it's letting me post now (I hope). Although, I lost the comments I had here! Well, if that's all I lose, I'll consider myself lucky.**

lime commented: these things happen when blogs are left unsupervised....

wenchy commented: Clearly somebody got some action and it wasn't me

beth commented: At least we know what they're doing when we're not around....

Posted by Tommy Gunn at 10:43 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Soooooooo .... it's been a while since I posted anything, but there really is a good excuse for it. Mrs. Gunn is no longer residing at this location. She moved out May 1, leaving me and the boys here. It has been a trip to say the least. We had a leaky hot water heater that was flooding the garage and the dining room, so we kind of jury-rigged that until the landlord can get over here and fix it properly.
Over the past two weeks, we have totally cleaned the house, gotten situated in our rooms again and basically set up a new life, with new rules and new routines. It has been busy, but very productive around here ... and the stress level has been cut almost to nothing. The only problem I'm really having is that the Mrs. has not called or talked to the boys once since she left. I can understand her not wanting to talk to me and flushing me out of her life but they are her boys and she should at least call in to see how they are. [/rant]
My days have been spent doing laundry, dishes, vacuuming and the rest of the boring shit that makes up real life. I even started getting caught up on the ironing today. It's been amazingly liberating. Seriously!
I also got sick ... not just a cold or something but a bronchial infection that was turning into asthma. I missed about four days of work over two weeks and have been a slug on the others. I finally went to the doctor and she put me on an inhaler, anitibiotics and steroids on top of a steroid shot and a breathing treatment. I really am starting to feel much better although I am still hacking my lungs up occasionally. I'll live I guess.
One thing we have had plenty of is fresh baked goods. I have made pancakes, cakes, cookies and tomorrow it's overnight cinnamon rolls ... YUM YUM! Yeah, I know they sell that shit in a store but I like to bake so shaddup! The non-smoking thing is going well also.
Well, that's my life this month ... I hope to get caught up enough and in a decent enough routine that I can start visiting and posting on a little more regular basis. But like I said, you've all heard that before. Aren't you glad you asked? Now. What's up with you?

She has come by and seen the boys ... has spent a couple of weekends here (not overnights but days.) She said she didn't come by or call in because she couldn't stand seeing me talk to my girlfriend while she was here. That's the reason she left. And she couldn't say goodbye because she couldn't say goodbye to me. That may not seem to make sense, but think about it for a sec and I think you;ll understand. She is not Satan or a total bitch and I didn't mean to portray her as such. If I did, it was simply because divorce is not easy and I apologize.
T.G.

Posted by Tommy Gunn at 12:05 AM | Permalink | Comments (6)

First off, I have had to put a small comment modification procedure into effect because of the amount of spam comments I have been receiving. Serious shit it has been about 25-40 per day lately. So, after you comment, just type TG in the box below the comment and it will post as usual. If you don't do that, it will be put in my junk folder and may take a little more time to show up. That's TG without quotes. Simple, huh? Thanks in advance for your cooperation. Now on to the "other BS"
My son is home from school today. School was canceled. "TELL US TOMMY! Was it an outbreak of food poisoning? Did the school flood? Did a sewer line bust or did they find black mold and condemn the joint?"
No friends the reason is much simpler than that. The teachers want more money so they took off to gather in the capitol to demand it. What? Don't believe me? This is from "The Daily Advertiser," a Lafayette newspaper.

BATON ROUGE - Gov. Kathleen Blanco will join members of the Louisiana Federation of Teachers in a pay raise rally on the Capitol steps today, but the teachers might find a cool welcome in the Legislature.

Schools will be closed in at least seven parishes because so many teachers and school employees have requested a day off to attend the rally, the LFT reported Tuesday. To some legislators, that shows dedication to their cause but to others, teachers should have stayed in the classroom, especially since there's universal support for raises.

The LFT said school systems in East Baton Rouge, Calcasieu, Tangipahoa, Richland, Jackson and Washington parishes will close all schools. Beauregard Parish schools will be open for teachers who aren't attending the rally, but students won't attend classes.
A delegation of support workers from St. Landry Parish is expected to join the rally.

Sen. Charles Jones, D-Monroe, whose district includes Richland Parish, said he supports the move because "it means they are committed to education. It speaks volumes about their dedication" that they are willing to take a day off to show legislators that they seriously want a raise.

"Richland is one of the parishes in the Delta where education needs are the greatest," Jones said. "A number of the teachers in the Delta are not certified teachers" because the salaries are so low that some systems can't attract certified educators.

"This is an unprecedented opportunity, from a fiscal standpoint, to help them," he said.

State Superintendent of Education Paul Pastorek takes a different view.

"While I respect every teacher's right to visit with their legislators and bring their issues to the state Capitol, I do not believe it should be done at the expense of children and instructional time," he said. "It is disconcerting to me that teachers would choose for kids to lose an entire day of school and inconvenience parents in such a way."

The governor has a proposal to grant each certified teacher and certified school employee a $2,375 pay raise and $750 pay raises to support workers.

The Louisiana Association of Educators and Associated Professional Educators of Louisiana refused to participate in the rally. Representatives for both groups said they prefer to let legislators know of their concerns about salaries and requests for raises in other ways.

Ya know? I love teachers, think they do a wonderful job (most of the time) and put up with shit that would make most of us run screaming for the hills, bleeding out the ears and clawing our own eyes out. Most days. Today? I'm with the State Superintendent of Education. I wonder how many of the fuckers took the day off and stayed home? GET BACK IN THE FUCKING CLASSROOM AND TEACH MY KID! GRRRRRR!
Now back to our regularly scheduled programming.

Posted by Tommy Gunn at 4:11 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

Confusion, ancient Oriental wise man, once say "When blogger make no sense, randomosity is created in post." Thus is it written in The Book of Literarians, Chapter 7 verse 16.
1) Okay .. the smoking thing is going okay ... so far, but I'm sure I'll find some way to screw it up.
2) The wife moved out of the house yesterday. She was in tears and didn't even tell me goodbye. She did talk to the boys before she left. I called her to ask where she was and she told me "On my way." I said "Without even saying goodbye?" She cried more, told me she talked to the boys but she couldn't tell me goodbye. Some are surprised that I expect any civility or other normal form of non-hate filled societal behavior and feelings from her. Am I fucking nuts? Am I totally wrong?
3)Third, I wash the dishes prior to putting them in the dishwasher. I don't rinse them off, I basically wash them clean, THEN put them in the dishwasher. They come out covered in oil and grease. Does anybody know what the fuck is going on here? It looks clean on the inside, the water is not backing up, there is no insinkerator or other garbage disposal attached. I need HELP! or ideas at least.
4) If we can figure that out, then I will need help figuring out what the hell is leaking from my fridge. It isn't the overflow tray and there is no ice maker attached, but every couple of days water fills the depression under my crisper drawers and begins leaking out the corner of the fridge.
"For it is given unto those with awesome hand tools and the knowledge of how to use them to help the meek and ungainly figure out what the fuck is happening in their houses." The book of Home Depotians, Chapter 13 Verse 3-6.
Can I get a hand in the air and an "AMEN" from the Home Deposians? Brothers and sisters it has been written that "God helps those who know what the fuck they are doing and deign to share that knowledge with the infirm of mind or experience." Book of Stupidity, Chapter 19, verse 23-30. It's been written, it's been said, now how about giving a tool-less unclean village idiot a hand ... or at least idea. Praise Confusion from whom all blessings flow.
Amen
Now I'm off to chase a few women on the Island of Lesbos. I figure I'm bound to find a few bi-curious members of that stellar society. Wish me luck and remember ...

To read more words of wisdom from this venerable eastern sage, (Confusion, not Jesus) click the continue reading button.

1 - Virginity like bubble, one prick - all gone.

2 - Man who run in front of car get tired.

3 - Man who run behind car get exhausted.

4 - Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.

5 - Foolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife upright organ.

6 - Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.

7 - Man with one chopstick go hungry.

8 - Man who scratch ass should not bite fingernails.

9 - Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.

10 - Baseball is wrong; man with four balls cannot walk.

11 - Panties not best thing on earth, but next to best thing on earth.

12 - War does not determine who is right; war determine who is left.

13 - Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cat house.

14 - Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.

15 - It take many nails to build crib, only one screw to fill it.

16 - Man who drive like hell bound to get there.

17 - Man who stand on toilet is high on pot.

18 - Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.

19 - Man who fish in other man’s well often catch crabs.

20 - Man who fart in church sit in own pew.

21 - Crowded elevator smell different to midget.

Posted by Tommy Gunn at 10:53 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)